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2nd Grade

Thursday, December 30, 2010

OMG, you are adopting...you are almost 50 years old!

Fifty...not quite yet, but close.  We cannot be that old...our birth certificates need to be authenticated!!! (Authenticated-A little adoption humor)

You know Sonja and I have been talking about adopting a child for about 7-8 years now. All of our discussions were centered around international adoptions. We never really contemplated adopting domestically. The countries we had strongly considered and were drawn to were Korea, China and Ethiopia. On several occasions we had reached out to Holt International who specializes in International Adoptions and have a local office in Omaha. I must say they have been a wonderful resource and we have met a number of families who have successfully worked through Holt to adopt internationally.They sent us a packet of material on at least two occasion in the past 7-8 years. I guess we take procrastination to a new level, don't you think? Sonja and Nathaniel (our son) actually went to a Holt sponsored seminar a few years back but never put sustained energy needed to move things along.  Actually, Nathaniel was very excited at the time with the idea of having a little brother. I know he be a great big bro! Looking back, I am glad we delayed our decision until now as we are thrilled that we were matched with Wen Jia Si Rou (Zoe Ann).

So...why adopt now? Why adopt internationally? We have been extremely lucky to have our son Nathaniel.  He is active, smart and a caring human being. He is growing up before our eyes and is turning out to be a fine young man. Though he tests our patience from time to time...but that comes with the territory. He always wanted a little brother or sister and Sonja and I wanted to have at least two children. So, now that we are in our upper 40's adoption, is really our best option. Bringing Zoe home will make our family complete. Zoe was only a few days old when she was dropped off and then taken to the orphanage.Holt has sent us a few pictures and a DVD of Zoe in her orphanage where she is having a meal and is interacting with other children during playtime.She seems to be very happy with the other children and the caregivers. She is very well taken care of so it is not as if we are rescuing Zoe from poor living conditions.The adults supervising the children seem to be doing a very good job supervising the children. So, maybe she is rescuing us or we are rescuing each other. We do hope to provide Zoe with a wonderful family experience. I think both Sonja and I both have known for some time that we wanted at least one more child.

So why internationally? The countries we had considered have a higher need for adoptive parents. There is so much competition to adopt a child from the United States. Both options can take a long time and requires a lot of paperwork. I have read a number of blogs where the adoptive parents are in their second, third, fourth year of the adoption process and still waiting. In our case, we chose the Child of Promise program sponsored by Holt International. This program typically takes somewhere between 12-18 months depending on the country and child availability.  The Child of Promise program allow parents to adopt children with correctable medical conditions like blood disorders, cleft palate, clubbed foot/feet, missing digits, webbed toes/fee, etc. By going through those program we have reduced the wait time approximately 2 & 1/2 years give or take. In Zoe's case she has a repaired cleft palate but may need some additional speech therapy. So why not other countries not mentioned? Well, Holt international only works with Hague Countries which is an agreement by countries which follow select processes and procedures. Also, not joking..our age comes into play.  Every country has their requirements for adoptive parents which includes age.  So we would not have qualified for a few countries based on our age. The other reason for ultimately selecting China was our fascination and respect for the Chinese culture and tradition. It will be our goal to teach Zoe to embrace her native cultural back ground while infusing the best of what the United states has to offer. How cool is that? So that is our story...I know we are getting more excited as each day goes by.  Getting matched and having a few pictures has made it real for all of us. In January it will have been a year since we began to complete and send in our initial application for adoption. It has been a learning experience. I cannot imagine what adopting parents go through when they have to wait 3-4 years as many do...we think it has been long looking at 1 year with another 3-4 months to go! Bye for now...

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